The Last Hurrah

It happens every time. During the gear up to any new diet, there is always a "last hurrah" period. It is a time to bid farewell to stalwart friends you may never see again: donuts, pizza, nachos, brownie sundaes, etc. Often this concludes with a "Last Supper" meal of profound indulgence. The mood on such days is bittersweet: excitement and anticipation for the impending life change, mixed with dread for the deprived feelings and intense battle of willpower known to lie ahead.

For some reason I always engage in this charade, and this time is no exception. Yesterday I threw caution to the wind and ate, among other things, two bowls of cereal (one of which was Froot Loops), a slice of pizza, and a plate of kung pao chicken, and a whole box of toffee popcorn. Then late last night I picked up Bill Philips' book "Eating for Life". In the cover inset, the following question is posed: "Were you truly happy with the food you ate today?" As I pondered this question, I quickly reached my answer: decidedly, NO. Except for the slice of veggie pizza from Whole Foods, none of the food I ate was particularly good. So why do I do this?

I think it has something to do with freedom. As in, I now have the freedom to indulge in whatever I please, but I will soon be giving up that freedom. I need to take this chance to exercise my freedom while I still have it. So I will eat whatever I darned well please, whether it's good or not, thank you. Because tomorrow, I'm going on a diet.

This is moronic. I mean seriously, am I a child, or what?

For starters, the concept that favorite foods will be heretofore banished is dumb. Every contemporary diet author worth their salt will tell you that it is OK to indulge, from time to time, within reason.

Second, the idea that I have freedom now but will be losing it soon is backwards. This reminds me of a great talk I once heard about debt. The idea is that if you own too many things (i.e. beyond your means), the things will end up owning you. The same is true with eating, or any type of addictive behavior. What seems like freedom is actually the opposite. While I am "free" to eat whatever I please, the consequences of my behavior make me a prisoner to my weight, and I forsake many other freedoms, such as the freedom to have a good body image, the freedom to wear whatever clothes I like, or the freedom to live a long life.

Finally, there is the obvious: the 800 pound gorilla which illustrates how idiotic this behavior really is. Why, for the love of Pete, would anyone eat anything that a) isn't needed for energy/nutrition, OR b) doesn't TASTE GOOD? It is mindless eating. Eating for the sake of eating. Now this is neither news, nor unique. Everyone does it (well, "everyone" meaning the vast majority of modern-day Americans, who are in general overfed). That's fine. But when you are morbidly obese, like me, you've got no business doing it.

So, a resolution. I hereby have to KNOCK IT OFF. Now don't get me wrong, I'm all for a little indulgence before and even during (gasp!) the Big Drop, but from here on out, it needs to be worthwhile indulgence. If I'm going to indulge, it had better not be for the sake of indulging. It had better be worth it. For example, I love brownies. But why would I splurge on a convenience store cellophane wrapped sad excuse for a brownie, which I know is going to taste like tree bark. If I'm going to eat a brownie, I'm going quality, homemade, from scratch (by the way, super easy, and waaay better than boxed brownie mix).

So for my Last Hurrah, I will go ahead and make the Bacon-Wrapped Shrimp with Grilled Corn & White Cheddar Cheese Grits and Chipotle-Tomato Butter Sauce, which I saw Tre make on Top Chef and for which I picked up the ingredients yesterday. Heck I may even make some brownies for dessert. Because I know it'll be worthwhile.